PS. I like you is a newsletter for creative humans with self-doubt. Subscribe and read along to get answers to all the questions you didn’t know you had about self-doubt and making a creative life 🌿
Quick note:
Hey! 👋 I’m increasing my prices (ever so slightly) soon, so if you’ve been thinking about working with me, now is an excellent time to enquire. You can check out my coaching page for more info — or if you’re ready to hop on a call, book one in here.
Sometimes my clients tell me they want to be 'further ahead' than they are.
…and they say it like it’s a bad thing.
But, wanting to be further ahead than you are is normal. It’s a completely human response to having a dream or desire, and knowing you’ve got some way to go to achieving it.
Wanting to be further ahead is normal. And not a problem.
It’s when we make that mean “I must catch up” that this can cause problems.
because…
1) We try take shortcuts. And then spend more time working out what the shortcut needs to be, rather than just getting on with doing the thing that would move us closer to where we want to be in the first place. As a result of all that time we’ve spent—not moving ahead—we end up feeling even further behind!
2) We start looking outside ourselves for all the answers. Which means we tie ourselves in knots trying to work out ‘the best answer’, according to ‘the experts’, rather than just getting on with working out what the best answer is for us.
To be clear, there is nothing wrong with looking to other people to learn how to do things better, faster, easier, etc. There is nothing wrong with wanting to learn things!
But it’s when we use that against ourselves, to tell ourselves we don’t know the answer, that this causes us to feel frustrated, despondent, like we don’t know what we’re doing… and yes, even further, behind!
3) Feeling rushed causes us to make mistakes. And mistakes cost us more time. And more despair. (Depending on your mood 🙃) And more feeling rushed.
4) We turn our creative process into a chore. And we end up feeling disconnected from our final results. Because we spend so much energy and effort in trying to catch up, we don’t enjoy the creation process neearrrly as much. And who wants to create something they don’t feel connected with?
***
So, if this is you, and you want to be further ahead than you are…
You’re a normal human being. With an imagination — that can imagine a scenario, a potential future, that is different to the one you are living in now.
That’s okay.
But, wanting to ‘catch up’ is not the same as making progress.
‘Catching up’ is what happens when we try to go faster to meet someone (or something) where they are — ahead of us.
But no one is ahead of us.
No one is on the same path you are.
So enjoy your path. 🌿
Love,
Kathryn
PS. If you’re ready to think differently about your creative path, and you want some support in navigating what a creative life looks like for you… I’ve got some coaching spots available and would love to see if we’re a good fit. Hop on a call to discuss further, or check out my coaching page for more info.