Three favourite questions.

🎧 with audio!

Today I’m doing something a little bit different. I am offering both a spoken version of this newsletter and a written version.

My original intention had to keep both versions as similar as possible (with some light editing for clarity).

And… that didn’t happen!

So I now have two versions of this newsletter to present. Both cover the same content and questions; but one version is me speaking to you, the other is me writing to you. As one might expect, really!

If you do listen to the audio and get to the end, or just appreciate what you hear, do let me know! I thoroughly enjoyed recording it and will almost certainly do it again, but it’s always nice to know how it’s received.

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On to the written version!

For today’s newsletter, I’m sharing three of my favourite questions. I’ve personally found them super helpful throughout the year, and thought it would be fun to share them as wee reflective exercises.

As with all good questions, it’s helpful if you’re in a space to receive them. So if that’s not you right now, you might want to save them and come back to them later — so you can dive in deep proper.

Having said that, I also don’t recommend taking them too seriously. They’re great for exploring, for immersing yourself in… for having a dip and then coming back out again, refreshed and with a new perspective.

So, with that in mind… :)

1. What are you tolerating?

What comes up for you when you read this? If you take a moment to enquire… what do you notice?

The reason I love this question is that it can take us all sorts of places we didn’t expect to go. If we use this question with curiosity, it can shine a light on thoughts or ideas we’ve had about ourselves, or aspects of our world, that we hadn’t even realised were outdated.

When I’ve used this question personally, it’s been revealed to me that I am expecting certain things about myself… because it hadn’t occurred to me that I could be anything different.

That’s where the power in this question is. It asks us to look again at our circumstances, and our thoughts about those circumstances, and ask if things could be different. It doesn’t mean they should be different, or they must be different. But if you’re in the mood for looking at yourself from this perspective, it can be very powerful… and eye opening!

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2. Imagine it’s a particular date in the future…

So this is not one single question, but rather a series or cluster. The power is less in the individual questions themselves, but more in creating a scenario that allows you to explore your imagination.

When using this, all you need to do is pick a date in the future that you’d like to play with. A year from now is always good, but so is six months from now, three months from now… or even a few weeks from now. It really doesn’t matter, it’s whatever you want to explore.

Imagine it’s a particular date in the future. Let’s say it’s December 2024, a whole year from now.

Take a moment to be in that date. It doesn’t matter if you can’t see anything. It doesn’t matter if nothing in particular comes to your mind. You just need to feel — or get a sense — that you’re in a different place to the one you were a few seconds ago.

… So, it is December 2024.

Imagine this year has gone brilliantly.

Just take a moment to feel that.

Tell me some of the things that have happened, for you this year.

It’s the end of 2024. What has happened that you are especially proud of, that can’t you wait to tell somebody about?

What are you secretly proud of?

What didn’t you think you’d be able to achieve but managed to make happen anyway?

What went differently to how you expected?

Finally, what were three things you did in 2024 to help you make this happen? To make all the things that you’ve just told me about — what did you do to make them happen?

These are just a few of the questions you might like to ask yourself. I’m sure you can think of plenty more. The idea is to get curious. You’ve just done a piece of time-travel! What do you want to know??

Something to look out for when asking yourself these questions (particularly when we’re working with the future and playing with time) ...is that your brain might want to go all over the place. That’s normal.

Just come back to the original timeframe and start there. Imagine it’s [whatever date you set in your mind]. Place yourself there. And now there, is here.

Imagine you’re telling me — or yourself — how it’s gone. What do you think’s worth mentioning?

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3. Right now, whatever you’re wanting to do or achieve, what three things would make the biggest impact?

This is quite similar in some ways to the previous question, but the main point is to give YOUR three best guesses as to what you need to do.

It doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be what you think, right now, would make the biggest impact.

The reason I like this question is that it is eminently practical.

Maybe the first answer it that you need to make a phone call. Maybe you need to clarify something with someone. (In which case, contact them!) Maybe you’re really tired and can’t think properly… and you need a nap. Maybe you need to take 5 minutes to refresh.

All doable, if not always comfortable.

The point is that if you get into the habit of asking yourself this question, you will probably never need to tell yourself you don’t know again. (Okay, maybe you will, I won’t hold it against you… but I know for sure it will feel easier to go, ‘Yes, I have an idea. And I’m going to do it.’)

This question is excellent for telling you what your next best steps are.

And look at that, you didn’t even need to wait for someone to tell you. 😉

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I hope these questions are helpful! As is often the case with the tools we use, it really helps being in the right headspace when we use them. So I encourage you to find, give, create that space — and have a play 🌿

And please remember: DO NOT TAKE THESE QUESTIONS TOO SERIOUSLY.

These are not going to unlock some magical future for you — but they may also give you a clarity and insight you hadn’t realised you had!

That’s my hope for you with these questions. Oh, and that you have fun, if you’re so inclined :)

And if you ever feel like sharing what you’ve discovered as a result, do let me know. I would love to hear from you.

Until next time,

Kathryn

PS. If you want to go into deeper conversation, I am always available for a chat :)

I won’t say a ‘casual chat’ (because I’m not an especially casual person… 👀), but it’s the type of conversation I love to have in my newsletters… Just a bit more two-way :D

If you’re stuck on a situation and looking for clarity, I invite you to come give it a try. It’s completely free — I do it because I love having these kind of conversations, and I know and trust it will lead to lots of places I could never imagine.

So, if you’d like to map out where you want to be for the end of 2024 (🤷🏻‍♀️) — or you have something completely different in mind… schedule a time here.