PS. I like you is a weekly letter for people who want to create things and love themselves (more!) in the process. Subscribe for real-time thoughts, how to move through them, and the occasional random linky.
Current thoughts:
-- I’ve forgotten how to coach.
-- How do I start a newsletter again??
-- Ugh, why did I stop? When it seems to take so much effort to get going again?
-- Why does it always feel like this??!
🙁 *** 🤨
Hello from my first letter of 2023! 👋
I’ve written down my thoughts because that’s always a helpful starting point for me.
Find out what I’m thinking. So I can work out whether I want to keep paying attention to that line of thinking.
For example, today’s first thought is an easily ‘knockable-down’ one. Ask the question that knocks it down: “Is that true?”
Is it true I’ve forgotten how to coach? Probably not. Probably, exceedingly unlikely. Sure, I may be a wee bit rusty around the edges, but it is not in the least bit plausible I’ve forgotten how to coach in the space of two weeks.
Next 👆🙂
“How do I start a newsletter again?” This is posed as a question, but really, it’s a thought in disguise — namely, “I can’t, or don’t know how, to start a newsletter.” “I must have forgotten.” 🤷🏻♀️ Etc.
This is easily remedied by writing any old thought down, and starting my newsletter.
Case closed, or solved. I have written; I have started. I have done the thing my brain told me I might trip up over.
Which brings me to…
Ugh, why did I stop? When it seems to take so much effort to get going again?
“Why did I stop?” is, in many times and situations, a very useful question to ponder. However, in this particular situation, where I am trying to write a newsletter, it is probably not.
If you find yourself regretful over, or simply questioning a past decision, you don’t need to ignore those thoughts. You can make space to thoughtfully consider what you thought at the time, and if needed, to tend to your soul.
But, pondering over a lack of momentum, right now, is going to do little for my desired feelings of momentum. (In fact, thinking about my ‘lack of momentum’ is going to put a stuttering halt to any feelings of momentum I do have.)
And so, I move on; from stopping. Just like that. 🤷🏻♀️
Finally…
Why does it always feel like this??!
Well, we could argue the toss over this all day.
Does it always feel like this? Or is my brain, in its current state and mood, telling me that this is the state and mood I am always in… and always will be?
This is a trick that brains have. You feel this way now; you will feel this way forever. (This is what it tells us, tricksy brain.)
Thankfully, some of us are so practised at recognising this phenomenon (when I’m depressed, and everything feels depress-ing, and I can’t remember a time I was happy… I have enough practised awareness to recognise, “Hang on! That’s not true; that I’ve never had a happy memory in my life! This is just my brain telling me so!”), that we can apply this principle to other areas of our life that aren’t quite so obvious or unsubtle as the extreme & ludicrous intrusive thoughts that enter our heads. (On occasion.)
*phew* breather.
Here’s why I shared my (beautiful/stream-of-consciousness) thoughts with you:
Because you (perhaps, like a lot of people) might be having thoughts about ‘getting back into the swing of things.’
And you have maybe experienced a few weeks where your routine was significantly different to what it normally is.
This can feel disorienting.
And emerging from that experience can feel...
similarly disorienting.
If this is you, I want to offer some thoughts. (More thoughts!):
Whoever you are, right now, is perfect. Wherever you are, right now, is perfect.
Whether you’ve gotten ‘more,’ or ‘less’ than you wanted to get done over the past few weeks…
where, who, how, you are… now; here; is perfect.
(How might that be true, hmmmm?)
Second. You get to start. (Or keep going.) From here.
You know how to start. You’ve started things before.
Sure, starting again might look or feel clumsy; but no one is getting points for finesse here.
Just get out the gate. Do whatever little trick or wiggle in the air you have to, to get your bum moving.
There are going to be plenty of ‘but-wait-just-a-minute’ thoughts entering your head, with all sorts of commentary on why you aren’t further along or how you’ve already sabotaged your success.
Choose which thoughts you want to pay closer attention to. Scrutinise the obvious ones, laugh at the funny ones, explain to ones that deserve tending to that you will come back to them later. (And write them down, so you do.)
This is just an opportunity to practice. Some other thoughts; that may be equally true.
Go ahead and see which ones you like. See which ones you’d like to try on today, to help get you started.
Here’s some thoughts that helped me write this newsletter. Borrow them, if you like:
-- I know how to do this.
-- What I have to share today, is going to help someone else, in their day.
-- It doesn’t have to be perfect.
-- The more honest I can be with it (this newsletter), the more someone is going to recognise themselves in it.
-- That’s enough.
(For me; to bother writing it.)
Much love,
Kathryn
PS. I like you.
Would you like to see what a coaching session is like?
(Well, now’s your chance 😎) I’m offering a free 1-hour coaching session — followed by a consultation; so you can see both what a coaching session is actually like, and see whether you’d like to continue the magic into 2023. 😉 Sign up for a session here.