One of the best gifts

It's my birthday today :)

It’s my birthday today. Although I’m in a bit of a ‘quiet communications period’ at the moment, I wanted to pop by to say hello, and: one of the best gifts I think you can give someone is to help them feel accepted. 

You won’t always succeed — ultimately the person themselves has to decide whether they feel accepted or not — but we all have moments where we question if we’re allowed to be here. We will all have questions about whether we’re being ‘too much.’ We will all have questions about whether we’re acceptable.

And when we have those questions, it’s something magical to receive the response; “You’re okay. You’re acceptable, just as you are.”

This screenshot is a message I sent to someone just before we met for our first date, and their reply.

It was so. kind. 

They didn’t know me. But in one word, they showed they were willing to accept me.

I genuinely treasure that moment and their gesture. Because it reminds me I can always reach out again when I’m feeling weird/vulnerable/‘too much’ and I’m inclined to believe the world doesn’t want me to be like this.

I’m reminded I can reach out and say, “I’m not perfect. I’m acting in a way that might be perceived as ‘difficult.’ Will you still be there anyway?”

And I can hope and hope and hope they still say ‘I accept you, you’re okay.’ 

The reason it feels like hope is because, even if you trust them, it’s still one of the most vulnerable feelings in the world to ask. 

I’m currently thinking of my friends; many of whom are going through a lot at the moment. It’s hard to say, “Yeah, I’m struggling,” when a world tells you you’re not supposed to share that. 

I’m glad we are able to share. I’m glad we have a place we can share. 

There is courage in sharing, because there’s vulnerability — and risk — in sharing. I think of my clients, many of whom have been shown it is explicitly not safe to share. Their courage, as they re-learn where and when it perhaps feels ‘safe enough’ to share, is inspiring to me.

Wherever you are in your journey — whether today you are learning acceptance, giving it to yourself, or extending it to others — may I salute you and acknowledge the gift you are creating.

Happy birthday to me — and to you if you celebrate ;)

Many loves,
Kathryn 

PS. I am finally starting to feel the most energetic I have all February! Anyone else feel that way?

PPS. If you’re feeling more energised and inspired like I am, and ready to make a change, perhaps you would like to check out my coaching package. If you want to create a change in your work or life this year, and don’t want to do it alone, this coaching container might be what you’re looking for.