PS. I like you is a free weekly(ish) newsletter all about figuring it out; day in-day out; getting it wrong… and enjoying it.
I don’t know how to start this newsletter
I tell myself
Whenever I write a newsletter.
Is it because I’m not in the habit yet?
Maybe.
Is it because I don’t know what I’m doing?
Quite possibly. Almost certainly.
Is it because I don’t know who this is for or what I’m trying to say?
All those things. All of the above.
And yet, somehow I’ve found the audacity to write anyway. Somehow it doesn’t matter that what I am writing is useless and perfunctory and more often than not indulgent;
all those things I will tell myself if I stop to think about it
long enough.
I’m writing this because I know my clients struggle with this too.
I know we wonder if what we’re saying is good enough or clever enough or authentic enough.
I know that it sounds like a re-hash of the same old things. same old drama. same old stories. (Aren’t we sick of it by now?)
And I don’t know where I’m going with this
Until it ends.
This is the work of the creative practice
It sucks
But only because you’re telling yourself
It shouldn’t be this way
It should be different
Easier
More productive
More coherent
More wonderful
.
I give you permission to make it not suck
By saying it’s going to be difficult or flaky or hard or whatever you want it to be.
You’re allowed to make it difficult.
You’re allowed to be imperfect.
And if you don’t believe me, then I advise you to bring your Loving Adult to the table.
The Loving Adult is the person who will hold your Writer’s hands as she has a full-on meltdown about how her work isn’t good enough and no one understands and how could she possibly think this was a good idea in the first place ?
The Loving Adult is you. And you are going to have to do some especially loving adulting.
The Loving Adult says, It’s okay that we’re not ‘writing’ right now.
Because it’s all writing. It’s all the work of gathering and stopping and starting and learning how to hold yourself through this.
It’s all the work of being alive and then some.
You can have fun. You can play.
Tell the truth to your writer-friend. Tell her how much you love her and you’re sorry she wasn’t supported in her younger years or the way she wanted.
Tell her how much you love her and you can have fun; but it’s okay if you don’t want to have fun today — because who she is and how she is right now is perfect.
Tell her the truth with love and kindness and you will have written so much between you that it won’t matter if you don’t type out another word today.
Tell her she’s always loved and you’re always here — and together you will conquer the world.
For my client who is struggling to write. Except, look how wonderful she is. Look how much is happening; how much she is writing — even though she doesn’t always know it.
That’s okay; we often don’t know what we’re doing. Until later. Afterwards, we see; we were doing it all along.
PS. I like you.
Creativity is the ability to feel wonder and the desire to respond to what we find startling. Or, more simply, creativity is any act of love. Any act of making. It is usually applied to art-making, but it can also be applied to anything you do that requires your focus, skill and ingenuity. It takes creativity to dress well, for example. To parent. To paint a windowsill. To give someone you love your full attention.
Connection is the feeling of landing in the present tense.
— both, Kae Tempest.
Contact contact:
hello@kathrynho.com