Can't think of any highlights for 2023? ✨
How about this question instead?
Listen to the audio (slightly more rambly) version of this newsletter here or read below.
Do you have a highlight reel for 2023?
I’m going to confess, I’m terrible at highlight reels. I love when people share them, I love seeing what people have been up to during the year… But I’m useless at making my own.
This is both metaphorical and literal. I just don’t have the type of brain that is very good at picking out ‘highlights.’ (Everything just feels like a continuous stream of… stuff? Lessons, memories, feelings, associations… it feels very difficult to pick out one or two events that stand out amongst all others.)
However, it’s not a problem! Because if, like me, you want to celebrate and integrate lessons from the year, but don’t know what pesky highlights to choose… here’s a couple of questions for you:
What have you appreciated this year?
What are you proud of?
What have you been glad for, even if this year was difficult, challenging, or didn’t go the way you wanted?
The reason I love appreciation is that it can be applied to all sorts of scenarios — not all which need to be happy.
In disappointment, there can be appreciation. In difficulty, there can be appreciation. In beauty, there is appreciation.
With this in mind, what have you appreciated this year? I’d love to know — in the comments, or send me a message — and I would love to celebrate/appreciate with you.
PS. Here’s three things I’ve appreciated this year:
1. Giving myself more room for “I don’t know.”
Over the years I’ve become much more comfortable with uncertainty. I can now tolerate it much more than I used to, even in situations where I desperately want / really would quite like an answer.
However, this year I’ve started to embrace that “I don’t know” is not only ‘tolerable,’ it’s sometimes the most legitimate — and even best — answer.
It allows room for not knowing… which can actually be a load off your mind. It allows room for possibility, for things to happen you didn’t expect.
What has happened in your life because you were willing to take a chance? Because you didn’t know?
Sometimes things don’t work out how we expected… but I can also think of plenty good things that have happened precisely because I couldn’t have predicted them. Because I didn’t know, and was willing to take the chance and see what would happen anyway.
2. This newsletter.
I’ve loved writing this newsletter, if you can’t tell!
And I’ve so appreciated you being here, reading. I don’t actually receive a tonne of replies, but that’s not a problem for me — I know (have been told!) it’s appreciated by many. I’m extremely grateful for being able to reach people this way, and writing it is always a fulfilling part of my weekly routine. Thank you for being here :)
3. Patience with myself
Thankfully I haven’t suffered extreme setbacks this year (and I suspect this newsletter would feel very different if I had), but of course I’ve experienced ups and downs, as any human would in any given year.
And what’s struck me is how this hasn’t been a big deal.
Yes, there have been wobbles. Yes, I’ve lost momentum at times and gotten sidetracked.
But at no point did I make it mean I was failing. At no point did I turn this into a spiralling mental drama of I’m incapable, I’m a terrible human being.
This is not to shame anyone who has been in this place — I’ve been there plenty.
Which is why I’m celebrating this hard-won achievement. (And I’m sorry if I do harp on about it at times, but that’s only because I consider being regularly patient and kind with myself one my greatest ever achievements. 😅)
I also want to reiterate, this is not a one-time ‘set and forget’ achievement. You don’t attain peace in yourself and then never think about it again. (Wouldn’t that be nice? 🙃)
Kindness is not a destination. It’s a journey. That always starts now.
I appreciate you being here, and I appreciate you reading this final newsletter from me for 2023. I’ll be back in your inbox in January.
Until then & much love,
Kathryn
PPS. A few months ago I mentioned I was planning on running a half marathon for the end of this year. What happened? I got injured! (Again!)
This time I injured my foot, through use of a muscle that wasn't quite ready to take so much repetitive movement and force. So there you go, no dream fairytale ending for me :p
However, I’m taking heart from the fact that I’ve never injured myself this way before. Which tells me my running technique is improving… or at least different. And that’s genuinely encouraging and good enough for me at this stage. Onwards to next year!
PPPS. If you’re the kind of person who’s thinking ahead to 2024, but finds it really hard — nigh on impossible — to set goals or even state what you want… let’s have a chat.
You probably have ambitions for 2024. But also, not everyone finds it easy to set goals or have a ‘vision for the year’.
Maybe you don’t need (or want) a vision for the year. You certainly don’t have to set goals according to what everyone else says. But, you might want to have a sense of purpose and direction. And I get that it can be really difficult to figure this stuff out on your own/by yourself.
If you get the sense that an informal chat with someone to help you hash out a vision or direction for 2024 would be helpful, feel free to schedule a call.
There’s no charge, and there’s no expectation for you to to buy anything. I offer these calls for three reasons: One, I love doing them. Two, if you find it helpful, you may want to work with me in future (but there’s obviously no obligation). Three, if you find it helpful, you may tell other people about it. That’s great for me, and you, and them.
So, if you fancy an informal chat and a sense of clarity… sign up for a call here.
Being regularly patient and kind with oneself. A greatest, ever, achievement if ever there was one! I like the idea of an appreciation list, thank you. And I’ve appreciated your writing this year.
I really like the idea of an appreciation list, instead of highlight reel. And the question, What have you been glad for?, is such a good question, because you can be glad for things not turning out the way you initially wanted. Like you said. I'm going to mull that one over!